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I remember dancing in the living room,
Singing our hearts out,
Your long beautiful hair in the wind.
Going to do the groceries extra hungry,
The love you had for the sun,
Breakfast in bed for my birthday,
Surprise breakfast made by a 12 year old for your birthday.
Calling you at 3 am to know if I could come home because some girls were making fun of me at a party,
The first time you missed your alarm in the morning.
The first day of my period and how sad I was about staining my favourite underwear,
Coming home after school to a brand new one you bought that day,
When you cut your hair for a bob,
The music getting quieter.

School supplies shopping, the only kind of shopping you could bear to do with me,
My first grocery trip alone to feed us both.
I remember holding you close,
I remember when you got a pixie cut,
The music getting even quieter.

I remember the pills, the tiredness, the hurt, being responsible for our house at 16, your confusion at night, having to explain who I am, your unwavering love, your fierce want for living,
The music stopping.

calling first responders for the last time, promising you a bracelet from my school trip a month away while you eat your jelly, leaving our home, I remember our last conversation, my last I love you, your kiss on my wet cheek, I remember my last meal before